Heaven And Fitted Sheets

I started out thinking I'd write about fitted sheets but I got to the part where I wanted to say how much easier it was with a mate who'd help out with getting the fitted ones on. As I keyed out the words, "but now he can't, he's in Heaven", my mind yawed over to the subject of Heaven. Usually someone points skyward to indicate Heaven but now, knowing what we do that happens to be fact, where does one point? I guess splaying your fingers in an outward direction and waving them about is more appropriate. The heavenly realm must be out there, not up? Science and its findings, makes it more and more challenging for "believers" in their duty of faith. If they choose to have it at all. The trouble is that the heavens are full of things that read it, such as satellites and probes  taking electronic pictures here and there, which has no up or down. But getting back to our nice blue planet and its inner space, there is the matter of the fitted sheet. I don't know about your house, but mine has a normal bed with a normal mattress and never, not ever have I been able to find fitted sheets that go on easily. It doesn't matter how much they cost,  they are all the same. They almost fit but it requires enormous knuckle strain to get them on smoothly, if at all. This kind of sheet problem used to be non-existent. All sheets were flat. You knew the bottom sheet  from the top one that had a nice border along it that many people still don't know how to manage. They insist, as with putting the table knife pointing out instead of in, on forgetting to place the top sheet on with the border inside, so that when folded over, the "nice" side shows. These sorts of things bother me just as cupboard doors that are not completely closed, or pictures that hang at a slant or are placed too high on walls. I have been called a Type A whatever that means.  Getting back to fitted sheets, there is another maddening thing about them. They are almost impossible to fold neatly for the linen cupboard shelves. I had a boyfriend a while ago, who fretted about this endlessly, even though he didn't make his own bed. His housekeeper had a certain method of folding the fitted sheet and he said it was perfect. And why didn't I call her and find out her method.  I don't worry about things like that. Perhaps I am not a Type A after all. Once I thought I would fool Fate and bought a king sized sheet set.  Aha, I thought, this will do the trick.  But it was worse. The flat top sheet hung down to trip over, and the fitted one had so much sheet so that it had to be tucked under the mattress on one side. And that was pointless. I gave the set away and went back to the frustrating queen size kind. Why can't sheet makers be more considerate I ask? What is the problem? All they have to do is ensure that there are a few more inches added to the corners so that human beings can tuck them in easily. Don't they have sheet engineers? In the old days, when I had a husband, we made the bed together. His hands were large and strong and fitted sheets weren't an issue. But few men are as generous about helping with bed making. Most of them arise and go about their days without a thought for the fitted sheet. I miss my once companion bed maker, but if there are fitted sheets "up there", I hope he's giving lessons.