Blame Game

Blame is rampant. In a news report today, a family member is looking to sue law enforcement for not being successful in stopping the crime which resulted in the death of the young relative. A saddened family member sees the death caused solely by the individual himself, as the Law's fault for not anticipating it. Clearly to most of us, the criminal caused his own death. All too often we read or hear or see in the news daily, some one or group blamed for what one has done to itself. The individual may have made a very bad choice. It seems that few of the offended look in the proverbial mirror and ask the crucial question: who really did this? The answer is "you did it yourself because you made a bad choice". You were the one who chose to do it. No one else. In the day, if you did something wrong,  you knew it was your fault and you owned up to it. That was the requirement in good homes. If you did the deed, you confessed honestly and were honored for doing so. You took your punishment "like a Man". Not now. The first step is usually looking around for whom to blame. It happens in families and other social groups who seem unable to face the truths of their own actions.  The new criminals facing court, look about for who or what caused them to commit crimes.  Often individuals plead a medical condition, a dysfunctional family, a bad crowd. Perhaps criminals should take out insurance against the results of their committing crimes? Small children on playgrounds say things such as, "he started it so it's his fault". Or, "she made me do it, so it's not my fault". Adults can't use these sorts of excuses. Fault often begins when someone, usually the victim, makes a bad decision. The outcome may not have been what the person intended, but the result is damage done. Threats to sue those who are said to cause misdemeanors are usually groundless. Suing is costly and time-consuming and is seldom successful.  Suing doesn't solve a problem. It pays for a portion of it, but doesn't always end the root cause that prevents it from happening again. We hear about the big money in sue trails but  never about the ones that result in nothing at all. So what is the solution? Fixing a situation is not about pointing fingers, but in finding ways to allow the matter never to happen again. It starts with individuals making sure that choices are okay and will not result in harming oneself or others and that are not criminal. And if caught, admitting that the blame lies with the oneself, the one who made the choice. If the choice was unduly influenced so that the victim was no able to make it, then there is cause for investigation, but most of the time, the blame lies with those who chose to participate on their own volition. Hindsight is not as clear as one might think. Choice is very broad in these liberal times and before making questionable choices, much needs doing. Researching, referring to prime sources and finding  all possible resources, is best before choosing. What looks too good, generally is. What's exciting bears consideration. What tempts can corrupt. What flatters may cost. What asks might demand. And when the end turns out badly, asking "who made the choice?".  There is only one answer.