The Gift of Death

 We humans can't help thinking and believing that we are going to live forever. We avoid the subject of death, but it's inevitable. No one escapes, just as birth, the entrance into life.  Here we are, on our planet, growing, working, dreaming, longing, loving, fighting, praying, suffering: all of it, but for only a limited time. What we do here, might not live on. Most of us are remembered for only a couple of generations.  Humans who have become through their works and times, can be famous or infamous. Even then, there are limitations to those fames because it all depends upon who wants to remember them and their acts and who doesn't. The living control the earth and our dead famous are only reminders of what was, be it good or not. No fairy tales or great deeds or spiritual beliefs or wants or hopes or wishes, will change the fact that no matter what we do, we all end.  But it's not all bad. We do, after all, live. Life is the greatest gift we own. No matter how brilliant or creative or rich or poor or good or evil, our time will come. And when the time comes, death, either quick or not, we have only one opportunity to live. How the ending turns out, long or short, often seems unfair, and those who believe in fate say  that our time and work is written to happen no matter what. We respond, okay then, I'll just sit back and let it all happen because if it's all mapped out for me, why should I fret and putting forth effort. Others, like a certain very old lady I know, tells everyone that she will be living to one hundred twenty because it's her decision. Some folks do, in fact, get pretty close to that age. And why shouldn't she plan to live "forever"in spite of fatalists? Her karma, she says, is of her own writing, thank you very much. But death comes along in its own time, self karma  or not. Death  isn't always quiet and peaceful. If you have been beside someone who is dying and there is a struggle, you know the thought we all have. "Please just let 'it' happen."  Death is one of the realities we don't want to look at.  When I say the "gift" of death, it's the one where someone chooses to end ones own existence. They want it to be their choice, just as the old woman who plans to live  until one hundred twenty, they want theirs to end before the "bad stuff" happens while dying.  Family or friends  sit about their loved one's last days, in support. The  time is called The Vigil. If you've been there, often you wish for a faster, easier release for the person and now, there is such relief as their personal choice. The legal implications, however,  can be challenging. A  matter of self-ending, is not suicide which is something entirely different but is one chosen by those who have a mortal illnesses and/or aging complications and don't want to suffer pain.  To people who have chosen that route for their dying, it's a choice that is theirs personally and they feel it is, along with their supporters, personal, humane and sensible. Even if the documents are signed and permission given, sometimes, the legal "formulae" doesn't fit. Because they have unexpectedly had to become involved in medications that remove clear communications, they are not able to have relief via their choice of time to die.They, therefore, are not able to have their wishes, carried out. I find this doesn't  make sense. The personal choice of the dying, if it's  known should be adhered to as planned. Someone who plans such an ending has followed previously all the rules as laid out. Life and legalities don't always match. I am left hoping that this problem, might one day soon be remedied. One's life, is, after all, one's own. It seems that self-ending, should be a human freedom that should include the ending of life be stated and unless at the last minute is denied by the chooser, it go ahead as planned. It can be for many, the  Gift of Death.