Artful Dodgers

There is a personality type that could be called Artful Dodgers. This person has the gift of the gab or an ability to perform so well in speech that the birds just flit down from the trees right into their hands. You know the sort of whom I speak. Some are actually pros at it and do their charming from a dais, behind a business card or a microphone or even across a candle lit table. They are basically very good liars. Everything about these charmers is designed to engage your interest and your admiration. They dress impeccably, their manners are without fault, their appearance is flawless. With not a hair out of place, these sorts weave their spells and take in audiences and participants who can see nothing beyond the smooth exterior presented. They are excellent actors and are able to know exactly how to manoeuver and manipulate. In short, how to take you - and good. Products are also like that. You are attracted by the smart appearance of the item and what the advertising tells. And, say the testimonies, you are going to have the time of your life with this thing. Lots of people have bought one of these hard to believe bargains only to find that on arriving home with them, they're duds or lemons. But it's okay say the sellers, there is a money-back guarantee. All you have to do it pack it up again just like you found it and send it back. Lovely. First to get it out of the package was like extracting hens teeth. It was trapped inside its plastic so tightly you had to take a hammer and chisel to get the thing out. When you did, there was a floor full of little while bits that clung to the carpeting and defied even the vacuum cleaner. I was caught up by a charmer.  I went out to buy a sewing machine mainly because my old one had a broken needle threader and I knew that if I bought the part and had it installed, it would cost about as much as a new cheapie machine. I did diligence and went on line to see where I could purchase a new machine that had a few features that my old one had as well as a needle threader. Eureka! I did, and it was a very good brand name, one that had withstood the trials of time. I took it home, delighted with my bargain. I set it up and used the needle threader. It was wonderful. Threaded right off. When the thread broke some time later, with confidence, I used the needle threader again.  Alas, it did not work. I read the instruction book. Perhaps I was doing it incorrectly.  Not so. I tried it over and over again and the thread did not pop into the eye of the needle. I gave up and put my glasses on and hand-threaded it. Try as I might, squinting notwithstanding, I couldn't see the little hole to put the thread through without glasses. I should return the thing was my first thought. True, but I gave up. Why? First, the invoice said that I could not take it back to the store but must seek out the repair depot. That place was fifty miles away down a freeway that is like the Indy 500. Of course, even if I did so, I would have to go back down the freeway, to retrieve it after it was fixed. And who is to say that the threader wouldn't fail all over again? (History tells me such.) Furthermore, the cost of the repair plus gas plus stress made it less and less desirable. My great bargain rests now on my sewing desk, brand new and shiny with its useless needle threader, and right beside it, sits my pair of eye glasses. Even sewing machines can be charged with artful dodgery.