Naggery

One of the worst phrases a woman can inflict on a man is "you should ...". Wives may be able to get away with this, but not lovers. It's called advice -giving and a man turns cold at those words. It is, unfortunately,  a rare girlfriend who doesn't gradually fall into wifely habits the longer she has been in a relationship, common law notwithstanding. It makes one cringe to see certain girlfriends, rattling off instructions and directions to the man she once admired at a respectful distance. Where this miserable flaw originates is mysterious. Could be from other women relatives or friends or merely the old "familiarity breeds contempt" place. Whatever it is and wherever it came from, it doesn't work. First, no one wants advice unless asked for and second, even then, it has to be doled out sparingly and tactfully. Sometimes it can be introduced with "May I make a suggestion?" There are times when the purple sock and the striped red one he is wearing, cry out for a piece of advice. Or when the turn-signal on his car has been clicking for half and hour and he doesn't hear it. Or when he is wearing part of his dinner-out on his beard. These sorts of times, advice is a kindness if not a duty. What makes me cringe to hear, is advice such as "you should wear this" or "you should not eat/drink that" or "this is how your place should look ". Those are personal choices that are what he is, and though they may drive you up the wall, that's where he came from when you found him and if you change him too much, even you might not like the new-and-improved version. I know there are desperate women who see their almost ideal man, one that needs just a-little-tweaking to become perfect, but that effort may be the very thing that sends him packing. Every woman has her limits fortunately, but take my advice, never, never should she accept The One who needs changing. Men might go underground with their annoying habits, but they never change.