Whitest Pearly White

Teeth used to be something natural but now they are the outstanding feature of faces. The teeth of the future, are dazzling white and beyond perfectly formed. My dentist didn't believe in the startlingly white tooth fashion statement when I had all my caps installed. He believed in the natural look. How old fashioned is that? But at the time I felt,  I could join the other perfect smile population and I was very pleased. My former natural teeth were just fine but when the old fillings needed ousting, I was encouraged by the dentist to go for caps. A bit later when snow white dazzlers came into fashion in  a big way and people opted for the whiter than white variety, it was too late for my naturally coloured caps to vie in the fashion scene. I had normal looking teeth. I began to see nothing but white, white teeth after that. People with the whiter whites, grinned a lot. Their photos looked like dental office posters. They were pictures of perfection toothwise. For the price of all new kitchen appliances in the latest finishes, you could get yourself a rack of pearly choppers that could cause cramps with all of the smiling you had to do from that moment on. Formerly plain Jacks and Jills, rose from being shy and bashful, to stunning creatures who smiled at everyone non-stop and made loads more friends and lovers than they knew what to do with. Who wouldn't want to cuddle up to thousands of dollars worth of dazzling snowy white plastic? Those lily whites just beckoned to be adored. The glitteringly pristine set of teeth invited your set to communicate in unison. People who used to be retiring and prim, were now social wonders with their shiny sets of frontal decor. Their smiles grew wider and taller. Selfies became a requirement. If you've got 'em, flaunt 'em was the word. The mouths of political figures, once serious and pondering, now sported  marvellous grinners that blinded even those on the opposite side of the House. Of course those opposite, beamed back in like sets of party porcelains, too. Out-whiting became the key. Who cared if no one went by the colour rules of nature. The whiter, the better. The more perfectly aligned the imposter teeth were, the better. There were professionals who professed adjusting your non-aligned head by straightening it all out with their miraculous dental arts. And when we thought nothing could be whiter or more impressive, along came the hewers and planters of teeth.These high dental experts went onward and upward and found a way to better nature even more by planting metal and plastic teeth, screwing them right into the bones of your head. If other other medical geniuses were doing the same with joints, so, they deemed, why not teeth? And the dollars flowed like rivers. I know a woman well into her dotage, who sold her home and little dogs, to get a set of teeth installed into the bones of her jaws. Why not, she claimed, they would last forever. She swore that even if she had only a few years left in her life, she would go out in a blaze of dental glory. When she moved into the Home after she got her new teeth  planted, she was the belle of the dining room. Her  famous smile lit the up Hot Dog Thursday like nothing before. From what I hear, she has a number of gentlemen in the place, begging to play Whist at her table every Saturday night. That's a lot more than I can brag about.