Goals Be Not

 Being human has its downside. We creatures of earth became what we are, good or bad, in the setting up of goals for ourselves. Everything around us tells us it is true. We are inflicted with making things better for ourselves including "and others". We want to fix it all so that we can be better-off whatever that means. January is traditionally, the time for setting goals to improve in some way what was, to what we idealize. It can work both ways. Some say, this year I am NOT setting goals. I heard a woman who is a foodathon  (her term) who decided that this is the time for her to STOP making food the number one important issue in her life. She decided that she is no longer going to deny herself what she had made iconic by not eating it. Dieting is not her idol. She is going to eat meals with everything in them that is not only healthy but of her choice, ones she truly enjoys. There will no longer be rules. She's going to have a breakfast in the morning and at lunch time she is going to have not just a dab of green leaves,  but a wholesome full one and at dinner she is planning to prepare a regular meal. She intends to give up worshipping diets because none, none of them work. If they did, they'd disappear forever. Food is no longer her nunnery. Food is something she will glorify and partake of. What she will do is stop giving meals restrictive attention. She will eat what she likes. She will have the potatoes, pasta, bread and any other carbohydrate that is a natural part of a natural meal along with the rest. She has banished from her life the word diet, and she does not appreciate having to listen to other people addicted to dieting, going on and on about what they do not eat and why. If it happens, she will rise and leave. She is not a diet addict. Not any more. I loved this story because I, too, am tired of hearing this topic when there are so many more important issues that are  worthy of conversation. This woman threw away her scale. She doesn't worry about how many steps she takes or kilometers she runs or walks. She walks because she pays attention to where she is, not how far she has gone. She buys clothes from the racks that fit. She no longer shames herself  about size. She has freed herself from the stress of  diet denial. I love this story because it makes innate sense. What we worry about NOT doing is what we are obsessed with wanting to do. We want the "bad boy" because it's more exciting. There's no more need for binging when you've already had what you used to binge on. You've taken away the bars you set up for yourself, and you've freed yourself from those unrealistic goals you set for yourself. There's no need to Tweet or Tube or any other cute term because your new self doesn't need "their" approval little heart or check-mark. You're done with that, too. You matter. Your freedom from goals approach, has eliminated what was really your failing. You already know what's best and most healthy for unique you. So live the life you love. The happy you of you is your goal and it doesn't include steps or sizes or calories or pounds or, or, or.