Table For One, Please

One of the mysteries of being a single woman is the matter of dining alone at a restaurant. In our society, it is not customary or perhaps, accepted, for a lady to partake of food or drink alone without suspicion. Men can sit at a table to eat on their own, usually with a newspaper wielded ahigh for privacy, but a woman, has nothing of that ilk ever since fans went out of vogue. The single female seems to attract certain boorish males to think that she asks for the attentions of a man. Those of you who have experienced an uninvited encounter such as this, know of whence I speak. The other day while enjoying a pretty tray of sushi and a glass of Chardonnay because I dislike Saki, a rotund chap ambled over and made a remark that defies comment. I tried to be as polite as I could under the circumstances and his retort when so rejected, was not only insulting but also, crude. As I went through to the last nibble and sip, I began to ponder on the situation and why it occurred. I know it does to most single women I have had occasion to discuss it with. We people, seem like fish, to have the need to "join up". We consider that life takes place in groups of two or more and that anyone who actually revels in solitary activities, is not normal. Some of us quite like our own company and engage in self-dating frequently. There are women who are born spinsters and stay one-alone all their lives and they have perfectly good sense. There are others of us who did not volunteer to being solo ladies, but who were, in  one way or another, tossed into the single life. Divorce, widowhood or abandonment by a mate happens. And while it is not always our choice, we eventually, go out and about on our own. We must. We have business to do, entertainment to carry on and travel hither and yon quite happily and independently thank-you-very-much. You do become accustomed to flying solo and it can be a rather pleasant occupation even after long perfect years of marriage. And no, we are not always hot to trot to find a man to fill that space on the couch beside us. What do you do all day, I have been asked. The tender of that question is usually a married woman. I should answer, "pretty much everything that you do". Believe it or not, we have business matters, laundry, cooking, cleaning, reading, car care, plant tending and family attention, perhaps a job. We live just as any other person. The difference between not living with someone else or living with someone, is that we design our day exactly as we chose. I consider it a luxury. I know widows and single women who pine for a man with whom to share their lives and that's just fine. Most of us have no intention of going shopping for one on line. You can't mail them back. Although finding one  can be the problem. If you aren't the joining type or a bar fly, you have to pin your hopes on Fate. And he's a busy fellow. The older you are, the harder it gets. Young women can bounce out of one relationship and into another  with relative ease, but we mature women are pickier. Our horizons are set a bit further out and our tastes are rather more finely honed. Experience has its benefits and often on calculation, the single life is the wiser route to happiness. But if there are any old princes riding around on their white chargers, they should stop with the ingénues and find a nice silver lady to take back to their castles.